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Mothers are exhausted: how to distribute roles equitably with your partner at home

Several investigations have reported that women are not sorry for being mothers, but tired of assuming the greater workload at home, looking after their children for longer and also fulfilling work commitments, which leaves them dead at the end of each day.

In a society that is still patriarchal, it is customary for them to be the ones who have more roles in the house, something that little by little begins to collapse because the responsibility is equal for their partners and the burdens, they must be equitable.

How to distribute roles with your partner at home

This is the least glamorous and most real part of what it means to live as a couple because they are compulsory and often unsatisfactory activities, but they help to have a clean and harmonious home.

For the psychologist, Loretta Nieto, in Vogue, The most important thing is to talk, seeking to reach agreements since the balance must be balanced. These distributions can be rotated or assumed fixed based on the preferences of each person.

However, it should not remain in word. The expert recommends that they write it down and sign it because thus “a commitment is established between both so that neither is delineated from their responsibilities.”

A key for these agreements to be effective is to make a calendar with the housework and thus Each person has stipulated in advance the date, responsibility and until the time at which they must carry out the activity to avoid being forgotten.

Other tips to make it a happy home

A reward system can be motivating for the first few weeks until it kicks in. The also couples therapist explains that they can be fun mutual benefits that also favor the relationship, such as a movie marathon or a romantic outing.

These types of distributions are very beneficial, not only because they make the work lighter, but because they avoid frustrations in the relationship, that later come up in discussions as claims or that make a dent in the romance.

However, you have to choose the ideal time to propose these changes or ask the couple to become more involved in the home. Avoid being tense or busy, But let him know that you are not asking for his help, since they are a partnership and you both have the same level of responsibilities to make it work.

In case other commitments arise, Be flexible if either of you is unable to carry out tasks, but not too much, because the idea is to do it constantly and not to overload yourself with homework. In this, communication will always be key.

More on this topic:

Disappointments we get when we become moms because of idealized motherhood

Caregiving grandmothers: unpaid work and the burden they have in caring for children

Celebrities who left their careers to be mothers: they teach us that it does not make them less successful

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